We’ve all been there at some point, the power has gone out and now what? With a winter storm foretasted for this evening here, I’ve given some thought to what I would do, if our electricity went out. So this list has things I would do!
1. Light some candles and read a book.
2. Play cards with my husband.
3. Go for a walk, weather permitting.
4. Find my yarn, or paper crafting supplies an create something for Christmas.
5. Cuddle/snuggle with my little son.
Okay, so some of those I do already. But it wouldn’t hurt to do it more often and for a longer period of time!
October, the month of candy, dress up and Fall getting more crisp. Also the month our first son was born, and possibly our 2nd. October, brings in the holiday season rush.
Last October was our first without Michael, this is our second. Can’t say it’s easy, can’t say it’s hard either. It just is. The memories come back, the hospital stay for me, and for him. The NICU, and my c-section scar. It’s memories, but not necessarily painful ones now. I can laugh and smile as I remember. I can giggle at the videos of our feisty little fighter.
This year we had thought about how to celebrate that day he came to us. But all those plans are now not possible, due to my bed rest. We’ll have to plan something special that can be done at home.
As I am walking this path, I’ve met others who’ve lost their precious little babys too soon. I hurt for them, wishing that they didn’t have to know this loss. I wish I could reach through the screen or distance and give them a knowing hug. Losing an infant will never make sense, while on this planet. But I seek God’s face every time I hear of another one gone. I don’t know why, but I know the Creator. I don’t know why, but I know His plan is perfect. For now…that gives me comfort. Until I can get to heaven and hold my Michael again, God is holding my scarred heart and allowing it to heal.
October is also Infant Loss and Awareness month.
If you have lost a child, or know someone who has, share their story with me here. Remember them as I remember my son and others who’ve gone too soon.
Although I’m sure you knew that, especially if you have children off to school! New school year rings in the hectic fun 1st semester.
For a few years now, I’ve been thinking and praying about my holidays. How I’ll celebrate them, what traditions I’ll pass down to my children. When I think back to my favorite times during the holidays, it’s not the gifts I received or gave that I remember. It’s the sounds, smells and family I was with that warms my heart. The traditions we shared, and the simple things that had meaning to our family. This is what I want to pass down. Not the consumerism, the hustle and drive to get THE toy of the season. That all passes away from our memories anyways, so why indulge it to begin with?
Then, when Michael passed, things changed. I gave more thought about how to spend his birthday. How to celebrate his short life. So many people don’t have as we have, in that I mean we’re blessed with family and friends who give of their hearts and abilities. I want to share that gift with someone, a child. I’m still praying about how it’ll come about. I’m sure it’ll take a few years to get it down, but I am happy to know that every year on Mickey’s birthday, someone will be blessed because of him.
My plan for this holiday season is simple.
To give more than I receive. To give more joy, more smiles, more love and understanding. To spend more time with those who are important in my life. To share the joy of the season, even in the midst of pain, as it’s the first without my Dad.
What are your plans for this season? What makes it special to you and your children?